In the depths

She wiggles her toes, trying to shake off the heaviness

bearing down on her like a crashing wave.

She wishes and prays to be free from the madness;

that nagging, clawing, scratching feeling,

that nothing she does is good enough.

She feels her shadows and ghosts creep alongside her by day

and by night, they attack in her dreams.

They hold her down and drown her when she awakes

forcing her to hit the snooze button just one more time.

But she fights. She fights with all her might

because she has people telling her she can do it.

But when those voices stop, and her shadows appear

she can’t help but turn a listening ear

to the lies they love to tell.

And even though she knows they’re lies,

her mind still latches on

and plays them over and over

until she questions and doubts

if there is any truth.

What’s wrong with me? she thinks

Why can’t I just be normal?

The assignments pile up as the anxiety rises

And she starts to shut down inside, bit by bit

until something tips her over the edge

and all of a sudden, she’s fallen, she’s broken

Her demons are laughing and prodding her on

until she’s laid down, beaten in the shower.

The devil sent her his own personal demon

in the form of a man who took away her strength

and left

her

for

dead

 

But she can’t be beaten.

There’s a spirit that lives inside her

that just won’t seem to die.

It drives the devil crazy,

and as much as he tries

she CAN’T lose all hope

because hope is at her core

 

She takes a breath

and lifts her head up high

Not today, devil –

nice try.

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